I’ve gotta get out of Varanasi. It is clear that every passing day makes me appreciate this place less and less. Mostly it’s when I get sick. I rebuild my health for a week and begin to really enjoy India only to get sick again, and then I want to go home with every fiber in my body. So I’m leaving in a few days for a break. I’m not sure how long it will last. The beginning of my itenirary includes Khajuraho (ancient preserved temples with the kama sutra in stone), Agra (home of the Taj Mahal) and Rishikesh as a place to settle for a bit. Rishikesh only has 50,000 people and is full of hippies since it was first famously visited by the Beatles. I might stay in an ashram or something there-good to have structure in one’s day.
So I hope to rebuild some of the serenity I’ve lost in Varanasi in Rishikesh. It’s funny, I always romanticize big cities as capitals of culture, but when I spend prolonged time in them I miss trees and gardens and mountains and a cultural scene small enough where I can actually be a player. But I’m really glad to have been in Varanasi, and learning sitar has given me a whole new bag of tricks. I just think that I’ve probably attained knowledge saturation and that it will be good for me to take a break. Soon I will start an exciting travelogue rather than the repetitive same-old same-old of the past month.
I will be so proud to have done this. The having done this will probably be better than the doing this really. But the biggest thing I’m learning or relearning or constantly in the process of learning is how to be by myself, how to keep myself entertained in uncomfortable circumstances, which I think is probably a brilliant skill to cultivate. I hope to be surrounded by community and loved ones my entire life, but to have a solid center into which I can retreat when the realities of impermanence tear away the stability of the outside world is a vastly important skill to have. And to be immersed in practices and music and books rather than the distractions of television, intoxication, and friendships of convenience and habit (not to imply anything, faithful readers!) is wonderful. Though for someone vaguely anti-internet I sure seem to be addicted to the internet!
Be well…
